1996

Robbie, Heather, Johnny, and me

An old friend recently friend requested me via a social networking site. I was happy to hear from her. Heather and I used to work together. Actually she was the daughter of the owners. Heather is now a mom to a 10yo son.  I can’t believe how long it has been.  Heathers opening line in our messages was “how is my favorite Diva”.   Heather knew all about the drag shows.  She was always supportive.   In 1996, I had just had a big falling out with my parents. They were not too crazy about me being open about my sexuality.  I think they were embarrassed.  I had already come out to my friends and had been doing drag on the side too. But just knowing the gay part was enough for them to not talk to me over the summer. I decided to give them space and time.   I had moved with friends and needed a job in the worst way. I had nothing to my name, except my old Buick. In fact at one point I convinced another friend who worked at a convenience store, to let me do a gas drive off. I would pull in; my friend (the clerk) would turn on the pump. Then I was supposed to just drive away with out paying. He told me it happens often at the store where he worked.  They would just write it off.   Yes, it was stealing,  but I was super broke. I was driving around on stolen gas.  I was worried about where my next meal was going to come from.

My cousin Johnny worked at a pizza place in Wichita Falls. He would call me and I would come eat when the owners were out of the restaurant. Yes, again I was stealing. It was a petty theft, and I knew it was wrong.  It was a good thing we never got caught.  I asked him to put in a good word for me, so that I could get a job too.  I got a call from Sandy Hincks, that was Heather’s mom.  Sandy and her husband owned the family pizza restaurant. Their two children worked there too. She asked me to come in for an inter view.  Sandy was a pretty blonde with a bright smile, maybe in her early 50’s. She was friendly, but very professional. She asked me several questions, and over all was a very nice lady.  She asked if I had any experience. I had none.  I think she sensed my need. And Sandy hired me on the spot. I would be making dough. It was not glamorous, but I didn’t care. It was my glimmer of hope in my uncertain future.

I got to know Heather and some other friends at work. (Most of which, whose names I have forgotten.  It’s been too long).  They were an extension of our circle of gay friends.   This job would set in motion the rest of my life. I came from nothing, and needed to work hard to make a life for myself.  Within just a few months, I had improved my situation. I was able to pay my own way.  I had seen other friends, who lived a life hopping from place to place and never amounting to anything. I was determined to make it.  This was my start.  Six months later, I was offered a better job. It was working for TxDot. There was an opening on the road crew. I knew it was a great job. (This job was one I kept for three years.)   It would be hard work, but I never shyed away from it because I was gay.  So I chose to leave the restaurant slowly.  I continued to work there for about two months, just on the weekends. And the owners eventually filled my position, and I had transitioned to just working my job with the State of Texas.  Sandy Hincks gave me a chance to live. I truly believe that.  She also allowed me to seek something better. I used this time to grow more independent. I appreciate her and the start she helped me secure.

Heather told me when we recently reconnected, that Sandy had past away. She will be greatly missed by her family. And it was blessing knowing and working for her. I cried a little when Heather told me. In fact, I was dinning out at a Pizza restaurant.